I like strippers. :)

We enter the strip club with noticeable distance between each other. I am wearing a collared shirt, a vest, slacks, and reading glasses. I am intentionally dressed like a square. We take our seats two table lengths from the stage and watch lady after lady twirl around the pole, collect tips that melt from the men that adore them.

A cute one comes on stage. Her final song is “motivation” by Kelly Rowland. She has an innocent looking pretty to her. I beckon Cinnamon to leave the stage by making eye contact and facial expressions that suggest I am interested but unfamiliar with the process.

She approaches us at the table and begins to flirt asking, “would you like a dance?” I tell her I have mixed feelings of being in this place. I pretend to be shy. We continue to converse. She asks if I am a church boy.

“Something like that. It just doesn’t feel right, me being in here. I only came because my sister ask me to.”

She tells me how she is a student by day and that she doesn’t always feel comfortable being here either. The connection seems genuine. I express that I can’t pay for a lap dance or give her a tip. It just doesn’t feel right. She is intrigued. She tries harder. She touches my chin. She leans in closer. She says she will be gentle. She places her hand on my knee. An awkward boyish smile cracks on my face. I flirt. I gaze into her eyes. She gazes back as if we have both found a forbidden connection. She rubs further up my inner thigh closer to my groin.

I remove her hand and say, “I can’t.”

Then suddenly my date, posing as my sister, shoves her engagement ring in her face and screams, “he said he wasn’t interested B__CH! Respect the ring!”

Our cover is blown. Cinnamon expresses her disdain for us playing games with her. She says, “we have feelings to!” She leave visibly upset. Facing my fiancé I ask, “What did you blow our cover for?”

“She was getting to close to my man. She isn’t supposed to be feeling on you like that.”

“What did you think was going to happen? Did you think I was going to take her home? We discussed this.”

“I know, but I couldn’t sit there and watch her touching on my man.”

The plan is to dress up like a square and see how much free attention I could get. The social experiment isn’t fulfilling because my fiancé has become jealous. I don’t like going to strip clubs. My closest friends and I have never gone to as strip club before, but I do like strippers. 

I like strippers for more than their physical assets, but I do appreciate a fine women. I like strippers because most of them apply the principles found in Robert Greene’s book, The Art of Seduction. I love validating the techniques within. It’s not cool to be taken advantage of, so I learn how to spot the games some women can play. I appreciate a stripper’s hustle and her ability to do what she has to do to accomplish her goal of separating men from their money.  Is it moral? No. However, all women can learn a thing or two about appealing to a man’s emotions. I compare the profession to a server in a restaurant that charges $10 for a cheeseburger. They are paid for providing an experience. It’s as immoral for someone convincing us to pay for butchered and grilled cow flesh by smiling and providing the illusion of friendship. They play the game. We play the game.

Even though they understand the fantasy that they provide, they are human as well. I feel bad for playing this game on the pretty young dancer, but we both came into this world of fantasy to take advantage of the situation and leave with as much money as possible. So on a scale of 1 to 10, my remorse is about a three.

I recommend everyone get and read a copy of the Robert Greene’s book as it can help you in all aspects of life. I suggest choosing to use the knowledge as a tool for good, not evil, but that’s up to you.

Spurgeon Thomas

Urbanity Life, LLC, San Diego, CA


I am a #writer#businesssystemsanalyst, and #projectmanager, specializing in community improvement and creative project management. @urbanitylifesd